Sunday, July 8, 2007
This morning, as taper week begins to . . . well, taper, I decided to get in one more run of the Ballwin Tri (also known as FTE, my First Tri Ever) Course. Everything but the swim and without really hammering the transitions. My plan was about 80% of race effort but, really, the bike ended up being close to 90% (maybe more) and the run . . . well the run SUCKED ASS. Donkey Ass. Dirty, stinky, just had some carrot induced diarrhea donkey ass. It was the run that wasn't. To put it more plainly. I. Walked. Walked. It took me over forty minutes to do the f*(&ing thing. In fact, as soon as I set out on the run I had the thought: "Who am I kidding? I'm not going to place in my age group. I must have been on crack." It was all downhill from there.
Or rather, it was all uphill. Or a lot of uphill. Suddenly the slow times of last year begin to make sense. Then I got a side stitch. Not just a "OK, forcefully exhale and relax your belly on the inhale, smooth out your stride . . . ah, that's better" kind of side cramp. No it was a "Holy crap, this is what Braveheart must have felt like when they were pulling out his guts!" kind of side cramp. I ran through it for a bit then said "Screw it, I've already lost this thing, anyway" and walked. I walked and cried like a little girl. Well, I didn't cry, but I wanted to.
As I walked, I tried to talk myself out of the downward spiral I was speeding down. "You had a really good bike. You're really getting strong on that bike." To which self answered back "I averaged less than 16 miles per hour. That sucks. I'm still two minutes over my goal pace. Total Suckage." Self said "Not, total suckage. That hill in the middle is tough - its going to be tough on everyone. And the detour cost you some time - just as it will for everyone. Let the bike alone. You did well." self tried a new tactic "Fine, you'll get through the bike, but here you are walking up this god forsaken hill. Walking. You're going to be last." "You know, next week I will not have stayed up until 11:00 drinking beer at a pool party the night before. Next week I will get up early and eat a bowl of oatmeal and not bonk. I will ingest a full gel instead of just half. I'll dilute my Gatorade and sip instead of gulp on the bike. Also, I'll be coming off of a week of taper instead of two days in a row of intense running and biking. It'll be a whole different ballgame. You can't use today as an indicator for performance a week from now." "Yes I can. You're going to be last." "Shut up." "You shut up."
I'd say it was a draw. Finally, I caught up with Hubby and we walked and jogged until the end. The best I can say is at least I did the whole course. I wanted to turn around but I knew I would feel that as more of a failure. I guess its time to adjust my goals, stay positive and just try to have fun out there. I need to give myself permission to not kick everyone's ass out there. Either way, I'll have a PR since it's my FTE!!
Tier One: Not to forget my bike (Thanks to Jane for that one. Go give her a shout, she's doing her FTE on the same day as me, just in a different state so we don't have to try and kick each other's butts.)
Tier Two: Finish strong, knowing I left it all out on the course
Tier Three: Not to be DFL
Oh God. I really am doing this in a week. Crap.
Posted by Larissa at 10:01 AM